The Essence of Beauty.

Today, July 10th, is my birthday.  Every year I get a bit anxious around the time of my birthday.  I think about what I’ve accomplished in the past year and what more I want to accomplish.  I also think about getting older and I worry that my age might be starting to show.  But the truth is I don’t want to be in my 20’s again.  I feel more beautiful now at 32 than I ever did in my 20’s.  I truly believe that the reason I have become more beautiful is because my energy has shifted.  I no longer compare myself to others, and I feel good about who I am and my place in the world.  

Outer beauty is subjective, but inner beauty is absolute.  True beauty originates from within.  You can see a woman who is very beautiful on the outside, and then when you speak to her she can become ugly depending on the energy she emits.  If she is rude, angry, jealous, or unkind, then suddenly your perception of her shifts.  On the other hand, a woman who isn’t as beautiful at first glance can become enchanting and turn into one of the most beautiful people you’ve ever met because her energy and spirit shine through.  

I want to be one of these women.  I am much more excited when someone tells me that they love my energy rather than my looks.  It is a person’s energy, their essence, that makes them attractive.  This is true for both men and women.  I have met guys who, maybe at first glance, weren’t the most attractive guys I’d ever seen, but they became the most attractive guys I had ever met once I was in their presence.  Charm, generosity, sensitivity, compassion, self-respect, confidence, and a sense of humor is so attractive.  Being engaged and interested in other people, and being present when you’re with them is attractive.  Caring about the happiness of others, but taking responsibility for your own happiness is attractive and so important in relationships.  It doesn’t matter how many gifts and dinners or displays of love and affection you lavish on someone.  If they don’t take control of their own state of mind, nothing you can do or give to them will make them truly happy.  Only they can find happiness through the thoughts and actions they choose.

Happiness comes from within.  Beauty comes from within.  Confidence comes from within.  It is a knowingness that you are enough, that you are worthy, that you are special and unique and lovable and beautiful, no matter what anyone else says or thinks.  You can have millions of people telling you that you are beautiful, but if you don’t think so then it really doesn’t matter.  All that matters is how you feel about yourself.  If you are constantly seeking approval from others, you will never feel whole.  You will feel jealous of anyone else who is beautiful.  Just because someone else is attractive, it does not mean that you aren’t.  Their beauty does not take away from yours, but your jealousy does take away from your own beauty.  There are lots of beautiful people in the world, and comparing yourself to every attractive woman will not make you more attractive nor will it make you feel good. 

When you can appreciate things about yourself and see beauty in yourself, you are better able to connect with people because you aren’t mentally cutting them down to make yourself feel better.  You cannot give love and respect to others if you aren’t giving those things to yourself.  There is beauty within you.  There is love within you.  All you have to do is allow yourself to see it and feel it.  We don’t always feel like our most attractive self, but appreciate what you can when you can.  Appreciate your quick wit, devilish laugh, or anything that makes you the unique person that you are.  Love your bones and muscles because they hold you upright.  Appreciate your nose, whatever the size, because it allows you to smell and taste and enjoy food.  Love your eyes because they let you see the beauty of this earth.  The more you practice looking for ways to appreciate and love parts of yourself, the easier it will become to love more of yourself.  You will become more beautiful because your energy, your essence, will shine brighter and brighter.  That’s where real beauty comes from.  And that kind of beauty never fades away.  

The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows and the beauty of a woman only grows with passing years.-Audrey Hepburn

Affirmations for enhancing beauty inside and out:

“I am seeing beauty in myself and others.”

“I am loving and appreciating the person that I am.”

“I am becoming more and more beautiful inside and out, and my inner beauty shines through.”

In love and light,

Sydney